You can run but you can't hide from the West Side Night Stalker...

What's your position on the Stalker? Yes, I dared to invoke the stalkers. Does the stalker get a bad rap or is he/she just a little more passionate than the rest of us. Let me make my disclaimer right now. I mean no disrespect, nor is it my aim to make light of anyone's bad experience with the unwanted attention of the stalker. That said, I wanted to touch on a few variations of this notorious character. We all know the text book stalker. This is the one that we hear about on the news that gives much unwanted attention, whether overtly or covertly, sometimes harming their subject. If we’re lucky, most of us will never have to go through an experience where we are in harms way or at the very least made to feel uncomfortable. But there are many degrees of stalkers. Hang on for just a moment as I put on my Jeff Foxworthy hat. No, we’re not going to talk about 5th Graders. We’re going to clear some things up, or try anyway.

You might be a stalker if…

You comb over somebody’s MySpace page, reading all the notes that are not to you and taking everything there as a personal affront to you. Is this you? Do you look at other people’s personal friend sites and proceed to click on the pages of all of the cyberfriends’ pages, memorizing their photos and allowing each and every bit of written text to be etched onto your brain, even if its not related to your original friend? Do you try to convince the object of your obsession that he/she needs you in order to “get right” and that he/she is woefully inadequate and a person of questionable morals? Well, you might be a stalker.

You might be a stalker if…

You call a brotha 73 times in 15 minutes because he fails to pick up the first time and you think he’s up to no good. Or maybe this makes you more passionate than the rest of us? You really think that calling this many times shows your commitment and persistence. You will not be denied. You are telling this person that you and only you love them enough to call them 73 times in 15 minutes.

You might be a stalker if...

You alter your workout schedule and routine just to be in the vicinity of another gym patron that you find particularly attractive. You linger on machines long after you have completed your set. You wait by the water fountain for that object of your obsession to come by and quench their thirst. You ride a broken exercise bike (when functional bikes are available) just because it gives you the best view of your subject across the room on the machine weights.

So, if anybody’s reading, share a stalker story here. The worldwide readership of D’s Daily is eagerly awaiting your feedback. Yes, all 3 of us. (And hurry up because I’ll only have those other 2 on the payroll until the end of next week).