First Thursday

I went to the prayer revival at my church this evening and got the spiritual energizing that should get me off to a good start for 2008. There were only a handful of us there but there was a lively bunch. The doom and gloom weather forecast probably kept most people away but those of us that made it were treated to some good ol' fashioned preachin' of the Word, and those easily amused (me) were thoroughly entertained as well.

It must've been a full moon tonight. Well, not that I would've been able to tell with all the cloud cover, but it had that full moon feel. Noticing the parking lot that was I-880 South, I quickly exited and made tried to negotiate my way through the rush hour traffic on surface streets. So did everybody else. That's okay. I didn't get flustered. I no longer drive a big car that sits on high, and looks down low at all of the other little hapless vehicles (cars that were much more sensible purchases and that seem to savor each sip of gasoline like it is a rare vintage of Tasco Refinery Private Reserve, while my behemoth guzzles it down like grape kool-aid on a hot summer's day), but I always find myself looking past the car in front of me. Perhaps that's just my personality, being a member in good standing of the vertically enhanced clan. If I'm standing in a crowded room, or waiting in a long line at in a stadium concession stand, I look over the tops of everyone's heads. I look for angles and trying to be two steps ahead, like I'm anticipating where the opposition is going to be should I need to make a move to the basket or zip a pass through the teeth of the defense.

Looking past the first set of brake lights, I noticed that the all of the other impatient people like me that thought they were going to pull one over on the Gods of Gridlock, were no stuck waiting at a railroad crossing for a train that would never come. Out of the proverbial frying pan and into the fire.I giggled at these silly mortals as I dipped down a side street thinking that I might find a viable outlet not being inhibited by this locomotive. (There's always that one guy that thinks he's smarter than everybody, huh?) It was almost like controlled chaos. If someone were to mount a malicious attack on a major city at rush hour, this is probably how they would do it. The conspiracy theorist might reason that these events had military precision to them, banking on impatient drivers would get off the freeway only to be completely stifled by the train. After a few twists and turns, I was back at the same train tracks, but I refused to let that stop me.I turned back down to another street, crossed back under the freeway and took another main street. At least I was moving.

The rain was coming down pretty good at this point, and my wipers were working overtime. I parked and tried in vain to make the raindrops miss as I scurried into the church. It was almost empty when I arrived, although the service was nearly 15 minutes old by then. Folks straggled in little by little for the next hour as we prayed and the choir ripped off several selections from the hymnal. A wayward toddler staggered up and down the aisles, momentarily free from grandma who was deep in prayer, cooing at many of the senior citizens that were caught under its spell, stopping their praying and singing to make funny faces. A couple of ladies came in and stood in the doorway for what seemed like an eternity, contemplating their next move. Clearly thrown by the fact that the pews on the left (where "their" seat undoubtedly must be) were roped off, they were too overcome by confusion to select one of the many empty rows in the center section. Finally one of our wonderful ushers offered his expert assistance.

We had a guest speaker this evening from a Southern California church and our pastor was introducing him when he suddenly interrupted himself and called out to one of the members that was just arriving through the rear doors, the service now 75 minutes old.

"Kevin...where is your saxophone?" the pastor called out to this gentleman, who often sits in with the other very talented musicians.

Startled, and carrying only his bible and an umbrella under his arm, Kevin replied, "Um...it's..um...just around the corner," sounding a bit out of breath like he had just run in from the rain, splashing through the parking lot after getting out of his car.

"Well go get it," urged the pastor with his usual infectious smile, subsequently launching into a testimony/devotion/filibuster that would've made any Capitol Hill Politician proud. When poor Kevin finally re-emerged some 20 minutes later ("around the corner" clearly having been a figure of speech), he walked straight up onto the choir stand and joined in on the rendition of Send your Word, just underway.

The circus atmosphere continued when the guest preacher started his sermon. He broke into song after his scripture reading, and then launched into a very poignant sermon about noticing the presence of the Lord in all things, as the Lord is not only the master of things in the church, but outside as well. He had so much of Arsenio's Reverend Brown (Coming to America) in him ("You know him from the What's Goin Down Episode of That's my Mama,...give it up for Randy...WATSON!") that I had a hard time keeping it together. Keeping my concentration to actually catch the message was no small feat. On one of his runs, I just knew he was going to tell us about how the Lord, " Rescued Jonah from the Whale..saved Daniel from the Lion's Den...got Gilligan (higher pitch) off the island...."

I looked around to realize that I was perhaps the only one finding this kind of amusement from tonight's prophet. Lord forgive me. At least no one put a fried chicken bone in the collection plate. And I do remember that he was referring to Isiah 6:1-10, so I was paying attention.

On my way home, the tracks on this side of town were now blocked for a train that would never come. I had the presence of mind to go around them this time (looking both ways of course), not wanting to be a sitting duck if this were some clever carjacker's scheme. I'd blame it all on the full moon, although a check of the Farmer's Almanac reveals that we're 19 days shy of that yet.