Public Transportation

I should've known it was going to be one of those days when I got up this morning. My alarm clock seemed to come calling way too early, and I was too disoriented to discern exactly what was happening. It was 5:15am and I flopped around like a fish out of water, trying to come to, in denial that my slumber had come to such an abrupt end. I finally sat up and prepared to get out of bed, having to brace myself on the wall to keep from falling over like someone deep in the throws of inebriation. When I'm like this, it's almost pointless to try to keep a time schedule. It was now 5:23am and I had planned to hit the gym before work. I had it all worked out.

Last night, I had parked my car in one of the spots nearest to the door in the garage so that I wouldn't have to toil with our supremely slow garage conveyor, car stacker, parking system (3 minutes to get your car out of its cage, and it seems like 10). I was going to get to the gym early enough to find a parking spot on the street in front of the gym. Nevermind the fact that I live a mere 2 blocks from the gym, I was on a mission of extreme time conservation today. The 6 minutes that I would save walking to the gym and the 6 minutes walking back would allow me to have that much more time to do all that I had to do before catching my train. Well, I was already 8 minutes behind, but like I said before, hustling is not an option. I did my best, and got to the gym by about 545am. I found a parking spot about a 1/2 block up from the gym, but at least I didn't waste alot of time looking.

My 6am basketball game was having as much trouble getting going as I was. In fact, it didn't get going until about 645am when we finally got the requisite 10th man to run. I wanted to go to the 7am yoga class as well, but that wasn't happening now. We finished playing at about 730am and I then proceeded to lift weights and do the world's fastest ab workout. Forget 8 minute abs, I cut it down to 2 or 3 minute abs. (See the post from 2 days ago: Slacker). I finished up and was out of the shower by 810am. I've had the biggest crick in my neck for the last couple of days, so I was looking to get a 10 minute chair massage at the gym before I left. The masseuse had stepped away for coffee as time ticked away, but re-appeared just as I was about to take my whip-lash-lookin' a-- (shut yo' mouth!) out the door.

My neck felt a little better afterward, but this may require some further attention (and maybe some ice) later. I walked out of the gym and walked almost a block toward my house when it occurred to me that I had forgotten something: MY CAR! What's worse, it was almost 830am now and I might even have a parking ticket waiting for me. I all but sprinted in the other direction, across the courtyard of the Federal Building toward my ride. It was still there, and I had managed to get there before the meter maids. I rode on back to the house and now was critically behind schedule. I had hoped to have a bowl of oatmeal before leaving, but that wasn't happening now. I had to catch that 859am train if I hoped to connect to the bus in time. If I miss that bus, the next one doesn't come until 1115am. I had already heard the horrid traffic report, so driving to work was all but out of the question on this cool and drizzly morning. I changed out of my sweats and put on some suitable work clothes, grabbed my laptop and hit the door once again.

I was steppin'! As I got close, walking across Frank Ogawa Plaza, I peeked at my watch to see how I was doing on time. It was looking good as I came down the steps into the station. I made a bee-line for the turnstiles and...

SHAZAAAAAAAAAAAM! My life flashed before my eyes. A guy driving what I would have to say was unequivocally the fastest motorized wheelchair ever driven on this continent (in fact, it's not even street-legal in 31 countries) almost ran me down. He was headed straight at me, coming way too tightly around the corner for a guy going that speed. I made like Neo and matrix'd my way outta the way as he scarcely acknowledged the near fatal collision. I said "Excuse me," while he almost inaudibly grumbled something that I'm quite sure neither resembled "sorry," nor "my bad". That might've been it for me. I got a good seat on the train (one facing in the forward direction, no one sitting too close, and no coughers or sneezers) and relaxed for a minute, not yet acutely aware of the extreme hunger that would well up from deep in my stomach. The sista in the seat behind me had her iPod on WAY too loud, pumpin' something that sounded like she had bought it from homey on the corner ("Hey folks...i got dem CDs fo' $5..get at me tho'"). She seemed to be in a trance, eyes glossed over, and mouth slightly open. I did a double take to see if indeed she was awake and not a member of the walking dead. She blinked and I was satisfied. Amused as I always am by the people that walk from empty car to empty car as if the climate or the smell is any better from one car to the next, I found myself not once but twice having to coil my legs up to avoid being railroaded by someone rolling a bike almost twice their size.

I got to the my stop with about 15 minutes to spare before the bus was scheduled to depart. By now, my stomach was raging on like Chewbacca in a sheep shearing factory, so loud in fact, that I just knew the people around me could hear it. I wasted no time. I walked across the street in search of something remotely resembling breakfast. I walked right past McDonald's (those scars run too deep...perhaps a story for another day) and scanned the strip mall quickly for something. Anything! There was a Starbucks in the distance that might have something, if even a blueberry muffin or something. I was that desperate at this point, and didn't have a whole lot of time to be picky. They actually had some hot breakfast sandwiches. I couldn't believe it. Gold Star for Starbuck's. I took it to-go and darted back out the door as my bus departure time was drawing near. I desperately wanted to stop and eat this sausage, egg, and cheese delight, but had to wait until I arrived at work. No eating on the bus.

I sat between two blaring iPods this time. The brotha in front of me was rapping his lyrics for all to enjoy, and ol' girl behind me looked like the glossy-eyed train girl's twin. (I waited until she blinked too). Of course there was Bonnie Business Lady on her Blackberry, yammering away to somebody about something trivial but so so so necessary to be communicated right now. I wonder what we did before cell phones. How did we ever manage? We must've been ready to explode with all the things we had to keep in our heads until we could reach a land line to make a call. Several people shot looks in her direction as she laughed loudly and gestured as if she were in her living room by herself.

THE WORKDAY
I refuse to waste any good print on the lackluster work day. Suffice it to say it was waaaaaaaay too long and I didn't finish what I wanted to finish, so I'll be doing what I absoluttely swore I would not be doing tomorrow: Going to work again.

BUS-STOP: The Reprise
It's 814pm and I'm at the bus stop in front of my job. I was at work so late that the cleaning crew came and left before I did. I even had to set the alarm and turn off the lights. Much to my chagrin, it was raining when I got out there, so in the rain I waited for the bus. And waited. And waited. And waited some more. I checked the time on my phone and it read 828pm. The bus was scheduled to be here around 813pm (well, for the stop about 2 miles down the road, so 820 would've probably been more like it). I checked again at 831pm and then watched as my phone went dead. The battery on these Motorola Q phones is just ridiculous. This was starting to feel like a sit-com, where I was the tragic punchline. I felt like Dan Aykroyd's Santa-suited Louis Winthorp in Trading Places as the pouring rain starts to fall on him. I laughed aloud.

Convinced that the bus would still come, I braved the elements all the way until 840pm before doing an about face and heading back into my building. At least there was a phone in there at my desk, and I could get out of the rain. I sat down and began to think about how I was going to get home. I made a couple calls, taking great care to find somebody that was not going to make me feel like a total idiot for having missed the last bus of the day and never let me live it down. They were in the middle of something but finally came to get me and drove me to the nearest BART station where I just barely caught the train at 1121pm. Still a little cold and wet, I was just happy to have a place to sit down and a moving vehicle to take me home. It took all I had to keep from falling asleep before the train reached my stop. I had to put my "urban" on (no, not turban...urban) as i walked home from the station.

Now here I am just after midnight, putting the finishing touches on this entry. What a day. All eating rules are going out the window as I'm about to eat a bowl of that chicken soup that I made yesterday. A big hearty bowl. It's never a dull day when you have public transportation to provide the entertainment.